I was born in Colorado; I lived there most of my life until I decided to become a liberrian. Sorry, librarian. I like to misspell things on purpose and I don't care if it looks stoopid. So, now I'm a liberrian and I live in the SOUTH. It's been quite the culture shock for me, in more ways than one. For one, I've always lived in college towns, and this is no exception, but they've been medium-sized towns. This is a SMALL town. No Starbucks. No mall.
For another, there's the whole religion thing. In the north, people didn't really talk openly about religion. Down here, they talk about it every chance they get. Plus, whenever you're driving through the state, and you come upon a new town, there are actually signs telling you where the churches are. It's just weird. The worst part? If you come into our town from the west, there is a huge sign with the 10 Commandments on it. I first saw that and said, "Fuck!! I'm in Hell!!"
Oh, and there's another thing about me. I'm crude. I have a foul mouth and I'm not afraid to use it. My humor level ranges from sophisticated to 5th grade. If you've ever listened to or been to a George Carlin stand-up show, that's kind of what I mean. One minute the dude's talking about language in a very sophisticated way and the next he's making fart jokes. And I LOVE it. I'm all about the extremes, baby.
*UPDATE: I am no longer living in the SOUTH. I am now in the Pacific Northwest, Spokane, Washington to be exact. But everything I said above is true. And man, am I glad to be outta there. No one's proselytized at me once since I've been here. And it's snowed more times than I can remember now, more than five, anyway.
